Tuesday, December 12, 2006

A General Update

So, hi. Obviously, I didn't die from the plague. (Thank you for asking, Wetzel. Did you get my card? What is your working email address these days? Where do you live? Why can't I find you? Don't make me sing Faith Hill Christmas carols at you! Because I will! "Where are you, WET-zel?/ Why can't I FIII-IND yooou?")

I took an absolutely unheard of three days off from work last week. I called out sick Monday and Tuesday. I went into work on Wednesday, where several of my co-workers did everything but beam me back to bed with the sheer force of their combined maternal instincts. I took off Thursday, and I'm pretty much better now except for an annoying lingering cough.

But look! My ears work again! I can yawn without whimpering in pain! Rockin'!

Meanwhile, Joel is sick now, despite ingesting a frightening amount of Airborne and washing his hands like Howard Hughes. He called out sick today, but I think he's going in tomorrow. We'll see if this illness hits him behind the knees with a steel rod like a man on Tonya Harding's payroll the way it did after my attempt to work last Wednesday.

Seriously, though, there has been so much sustained coughing in this apartment, followed by double hits of cough drops and Dayquil. Yesterday, I was choking on a pear, and I actually thought, "Damn, if this piece of pear shifts a little and starts blocking my windpipe, I am in DEEP SHIT. Because Joel will not come check on me. He thinks I'm coughing and looking for more cough drops. I will die here on the kitchen floor, and he will merely think I found the Halls. He might not find me for HOURS. Maybe I should find a pen and write a 'I am choking on a pear' note while I have enough oxygen to do it..."

Meanwhile, I'm truckin' down the holiday to-do list. I have all my cards sent, dozens of cookies baked, mostly everything wrapped, just a few more small presents to buy, most photo client orders filled if not shipped, plus getting ready for the Magical Manhattan Weekend coming up. There will be Christmas light-seeing, Reindeer hoof-print spotting, Santa-letter mailing, Nutcracker viewing, Rockefeller tree-viewing, and Kris Kringle-visiting.

I just have to clean, grocery shop, launder some towels and make an appointment for Bella at the groomer to take care of her Talons of Pre-Schooler Doom before the house guests arrive.

P.S. To Wetzel: "Katherine! Christopher! Babila! Give me your hand, come along with me!"


shannon said...

Why am I suddenly compelled to start taking a ridiculous amount of Airborne and pushing it on the kiddo, as well?
Don't stress yourself out getting things ready for us. If you could see the chaos (it's clean, just a mess) we live in most of the time, you wouldn't worry nearly as much as I know you do.
And I don't think Bella's ever jumped on Gabs (although I guess there's a first time for everything), so if the talon clipping doesn't happen, I'm sure it'll be fine.

Wetzel said...

I love that you quoted Amahl and the Night Visitors. I got your card yesterday, thank you SOOOOOOOO much! Sending you an email right now, FD.


becky said...

excuse me, but O.M.G.
snorted a bit of wine up my nose there.

Chunky Photojournalist Barbie said...

Hey Bek,
I know you check the blog occasionally, but I wasn't sure if you were around. Enders checks even more sporadically, esp. as this is his busy week for carol concerts, but "Babila!" was absolutely, 100% for you, too. CAC!

Shannon- we're on the road to recovery here and no longer contagious. I disinfected everything earlier, and will do so again before you arrive. Two bags are fine, car wise. Travel times received. An hour early might be good idea with holiday chaos on trains. Must discuss: people who are less than supportive about Big Things In the Works. Am polished my pointy, pointy boots in preparation for ass-kickin;' have picked up gallon of gasoline and matches. (Joke).

Wetzel said...

Did you just say CAC?!?!?!?! I need to google her and find out what's new. We were so mean to her. Becky was such a bad influence on us, don't you think, Ange?

Call me Mary Jo...Call me Mary Jo...

Chunky Photojournalist Barbie said...

Oh, hell, no. You should NOT give me challenges like that. Don't you know I get paid to be nosy for a living?!?

This is my best guess for an accurate google hit on CAC:

I did find this about Christina Buu on classmates.com..

Q:What do you do with your free time:
A:Go to movies, Have drinks with friends, Listen to music, Surf the Internet, Watch TV, Work on my hobbies

Q: Current relationship status:
A: In a committed relationship

Q: About children:
A: I don't have any children

Earth shattering, I know. I'm sure it goes without saying that, YOU, Wetzel, you are the source of all my pettiness and evil. ;)

Call me Mary Jo,

Nigulabi Yesu to you, too.