Heartbreak: Month 4

spitter
Originally uploaded by GypsyPeach.

Heartbreak: Month 4

Well, now... As I sit down to write this entry, I feel like it may be the last heartbreak update I feel compelled to write. It's been four months, during which I went through all the stages: sadness, denial, anger, Ben and Jerry's, distraction, back to anger, sadness again, then some more anger with the anger, you know?

According to my calculations, Stephen and I logged a grand total of 12.5 hours on the phone in the last four months. In only 12.5 hours, I learned more about the sudden, unexpected end of a relationship I believed had the power to last for the rest of my life. I came to terms with losing half my family, which, ultimately, will be my biggest loss of all in the long run, I think. I'd like to think that's true for both of us, that he feels a sense of loss when it comes to my family, and friends who are like family, too. In 12.5 hours, I got answers to my questions. Then I got the REAL answers to my questions, and I did a lot of screaming.