Sunday, July 13, 2003

Speaking of Too Much Information, (we weren't but I can't get my comments to work).....

I went to the ladies room today in a gym. I was at the sink, glaring with my peripheral vision at the evil beckoning scale looming at me from the other side of the locker room (I try not to weigh myself anymore, ever), and two women came in to weigh themselves.

They were speaking in Spanish, and their conversation caught my attention (because I'm a big dork) when the one woman was saying her weight. She weighs 112 pounds, apparently, but she was using the word "siglo" not "ciento" when she was saying "100." Siglo usually means 100 years as in century, and ciento usually means 100 as in money, percentage or weight, so I was sort of surprised and wondered what dialect she was speaking. (Yup, I'm a really big dork).

Anyway, they go over to the mirror and the one woman kind of tugs at her shorts and says, in Spanglish, "Ay, my bebe- it' killing me!" I look over, thinking that at 112 pounds, she is the most slender pregnant woman I have ever seen. She catches me glancing at her, and blushes fire engine red, and says, "Oh my God, I'm so sorry!" and I said, "No, I was just thinking you are the most slender pregnant woman I have ever seen." Smile.

She tugs on her shorts again and laughs and it is at this point that I realize that "bebe" is slang for female anatomy, and this total stranger was basically telling that her cooter is killing her. (Which, by the way, adds a who,e new level, of chachiness to those trendy tight tee shirts with the word "bebe" picked out in fake rhinestones on them) So she says, "Oh no! I have cr@bs and THEY ITCH!" while tugging on her shorts.

I was, for once in my life, totally speechless.