Bow hat= FAIL

Er.. hi! So yeah, in between all the editing, my own wedding prep, trying to get all my Milestone clients to a good place before I leave the hemisphere (Michelle, contract is SIGNED. MoH + Photog = BFF weekend in July '09! Woo hoo!), shooting funky ethnic jewelry for a LI designer for extra cash, and oh, you know, doing my regular job covering the deeply disturbing and completely unsolvable homicide of a homeless Vietnam veteran that no one even knew was missing until his skeletal remains were found in a root cellar, well... I've let the blogging slide.

And so I never got around to mentioning that right after Alissa and Todd's wedding, Joel and I went to Delaware for our annual joint-family week at Rehoboth Beach. We only had two nights down there, but it was just what I needed, a complete and total break from shooting.

Incidentally, there are many unforgettable moments crammed into those two days, including watching my 2-year-old nephew-type-kid Aiden eat his first Maryland Blue crab and finding out that he's going to be a big brother. (Baby-on-the-Way, you're adorable! Even though you totally still have gills and your arms and legs can only be categorized as "buds" right now. I don't care! You're cute! Stop making your mom barf every morning! Love you!), but my camera stayed in its bag the entire time!

Well, almost. More on that in a minute.

Our first night there, Kelly, Joel, Amanda and Tom stayed up laughing until 2 a.m. We took turns amusing each other with YouTube and ICanHasCheeseburger.com and Joel's new favorite, FailBlog.org. FailBlog.org is basically a collection of silly pictures of, well, failure. Okay, check these out...


see more pwn and owned pictures


see more pwn and owned pictures

Get it? It's a Microsoft conference, but they're using a Mac laptop?


see more pwn and owned pictures

Poor pigeon!

Anyway, we entertained ourselves for over three hours. We just laughed, that deep, contagious kind of laughter that takes on a life of its own. We filled the quiet house with it, followed by noisy attempts at hush. It was the best.

I should say, before I explain this next part, that when Amanda got engaged five years ago (at Rehoboth Beach, actually) that we decided to reclaim the hokey, horrible, humiliating tradition of making the bride-to-be wear a bow hat. We started making kickass bow hats. (See, G, we were already using "fierce" in 2005.) Kelly's bow hat was a work of art. And so, I was kind of excited for my own goofy, over-the-top bow hat moment. Unfortunately, the heavens opened up, and my shower ended with a flash flood, so Amanda salvaged all the bows and ribbons and decided she'd make me an amazing bow hat and give it to me at the beach. Sounds good, no?

Here's the thing. ... Erg, see, this is hard for people to understand, because obviously, I'm not a shy person ordinarily. I don't mind public speaking; I LOVE giving toasts. I'm not exactly a delicate flower, you know? But there's something really hard for me about this bride-to-be thing. I think- drawing now on my mad talk-therapy skillz honed in my years on The Couch- that it's difficult for me to receive publicly. I don't mind giving to others; I love that, but I get really nervous when I need to be the recipient in public. I worry about giving the right reactions to things, about appropriately demonstrating my gratitude. I kind of... freeze. It's awful. I hate surprises. I need to be prepared.

Anyway. Amanda knows this, and she's tried so hard all throughout my engagement to manage situations so I'm not overwhelmed. She's been great, actually. On our second night at the beach, she got out the bow hat she made me. She just wanted to show it to me before we walked down to the boardwalk for ice cream. She asked Joel to get my camera, but I thought we were leaving for Cold Stone, and... erg. Anyway, it completely aught me off guard. And then, everyone kind of came into the dining room, and Joel needed a new battery for the camera so I ran upstairs to get it, and it just became this, like, bow hat SITUATION.

Joel snapped this photo right before I- swear to God- panicked and ran out of the room. Yes, folks, when confronted with a bow hat in front of the people who love me most in this world, I RAN AWAY AND CRIED. Joel snapped this right before my throat clenched up and I had to obey the instinct to FLEE! FLEE! FLEE! I call it...

Bow Hat. FAIL.




My poor sister. The next day we had a very private bow hat unveiling. I did not cry or involuntarily lose control of any other important bodily functions. I think we call that "progress."