There are only 20 minutes left to get yourself killed before I walk out of here at 5 p.m. on the dot. Hear that, citizens? You have only TWENTY minutes to partake in Stupid Death Week before I head home for the long holiday weekend.
This is your last chance to get so drunk that you fall out of a boat and drown, drive drunk and hit an 11-year-old, jump off the Not-Getting-Dooced Bridge, or get beaten to death, okay?
Interestingly enough, Stupid Death Week 2006 brought us a new twist- A teenager's life was saved by his friends WHO HIT HIM WITH THEIR CAR. That's right, folks. A kid got really, really drunk at a graduation party and stumbled into the path of his friends' car. After knocking him over at a very slow rate of speed, someone called 911. The ambulance arrived and pumped his stomach JUST IN TIME to save him from alcohol poisoning. Good thing he got hit oh-so-gently by that car. If he had just passed out on the sidewalk, he would have died. Awesome.
Chunky Photojournalist Barbie wants you to LIVE!