And then I cried.


(Everything is fine, I am only crying because I am a big soggy loon. Stephen made me say that last part. :)

Oof-ah. Am sick. Actually, I am getting over sickness. My mom is here because I had a really high fever last night, and I got lost in the worst part of the Bronx trying to get home from Stop'n Shoppe last night, a store that I go to once a week and is nowhere near the Bronx. I was loopy and miserable and lost and fell over coming up the stairs.

As it is, I'm returning to health and my dog is snoring and kicking her feet in a dream beside me on the bed. My mom is watching something on TV featuring the music of Les Mis and Celine Dion (?!?!?) but she brought ginger ale, so who am I to complain? Also, I keep getting flashbacks of crazy fever dreams. They're always fun. :)

OH. MY. GOD.

Shudder.

You know that Ex that you hate yourself for dating? The one you thought was funny or "deep" and then, I don't know- they just turn out to be so annoying and awful you can't even be-LIEVE you dated them, even though you were young and dumb etc etc.

Stupid Mark has a website. I hate him. It is taking all of my willpower not to post his blog address here and encourage everyone I know to email him and mock him for being so completely overdramatic and stupid and homophobic and- AH. I usually don't read his site, because it makes me feel like a bad person. But I was reading a funny Vine entry on TomatoNation.com about this girl who is dating Happy Buddha Boy or something- and it was so freakin' funny, and Stupid Mark would totally go off and do things like Happy Buddha Boy, so I checked his blog- ARG. Must. Resist. Inner. Bitch.

It's absolutely hilarious. He talks about how a friend told him that gardening was "kinda gay" so he developed army lingo so he can blog about his garden in code. "Frost" is "Body Checking."

Alissa! ALISSA! :) Can I borrow the Willpower Stick? Quick!!!

I don't have much to say. I'm sad that I am out of the blogging habit. I think I need a new page design to inspire me. (Hi, Gwen! ;)

I need to wax my eyebrows. My hair is getting long. I am sort of trying to lose weight without telling any of my dieting nueroses that I am trying.

"After reaching the top, the pretend rodent issued a challenge to all who witnessed his feat. 'I knew I could do it—it was hard, yes, it's true. But if chipmunks can climb to the sky, so can YOU!' Chipper said, punctuating his message with a thumbs-up sign and a wink.......Gibson said that, with the exception of certain celebrities and politicians, statements like Chipper's are almost always made by talking animals, superheroes, omniscient narrators, anthropomorphic trains, wandering magicians, friendly dragons, sentient heavenly bodies, Jesus, and other characters subject only to the rules of narrative causality." -The Onion

If you once had a Dream that got kicked to the side of I-95 by the steel-tipped toe of the Jackboot of Bureaucratic Bullshit, and you asked the Person Voted Most Likely to Spend the Rest of His Life With You (who is always right) to beat you within an inch of your life if you EVER considered going after that dream any time in the near or distant future, and then, during the near future, someone unexpectedly scrapes that Dream off the sole of the Jackboot and considers letting you have it back, is Mr. Most Likely Right actually obligated to beat you?

What if you are both deeply opposed to domestic violence?

Does the phrase "potential member of White House Press Corps" change things? Discuss.

:)

It’s that time of year again….

Time for yearbooks and “Always remember the fun we had in speech class” and “Never change” and awkward messages from people who don’t understand the proper use of “your” and “you’re” and proms and These-Are-The-Times-You-Look-Wonderful-Tonight-One-Twice-Three-Times-A-Lady-In-Red and the strictly mandatory marching band performances at the VFW where you discover a truly frightening Snapple bottle with a 1/2-inch sedimentary puddle of ice tea that’s probably been rolling around the bottom of your uniform bag since last November and last high school sports games and the grad gown/choir gown change-off between “Pomp and Circumstance” with 56 repeats and index flash cards for finals…. And how is it, as I sit cross-legged in the wet grass with a 300mm lens in my lap, that, really- nothing seems to change? And, seriously, is there enough money in the world that would ever make me do this again for myself?

I don’t f*cking think so. :)