White Lady at Table Two!

Oh, good God. For quite some time now, I've been looking for the perfect pappadum crackers. These are the crispy, spicy crackers you get at Indian restaurants. I've been to three different Indian groceries, but for some reason all the pappadum varieties are the wrong texture.

It's been making me nuts AND I've been craving them like crazy. All the Indian restaurants around here serve them for free when you dine there, so trying to get them for takeout is like going to a Chinese restaurant and asking for the crunchy noodles only.

Typical scenario:

Nice Befuddled Waiter: Only pappadum?
Me: Yes, please.
NBW: That's it?
Me: That's it, thanks.
NBW: I don't think we just give that.
Me: Please?
NBW: Okay, okay. Let me check, ma'am.

(awkward pause)

NBW: I have to charge you $1.50.
Me: That's fine.
NBW: The chef says you can get a whole stack for that at the Bombay Market on Route 59.
Me: (knowing I'm coming off like a Crazy White Lady) They're just not the same.
NBW: Really?
Me: You have the best!
NBW: Wah, wah!
Me: Indeed.

So, today, I went into a restaurant in that weird in-between time when restaurants are open. We had the typical exchange. I waited for a good ten minutes, and I was like, "How long does it take to wrap up some crackers?" Finally, the waiter comes out and says, "We're still getting ready for the dinner rush. Be careful, they're hot."

Do you know WHY the pappadum crackers I buy at the store are always the wrong texture? Because the flat, gross, uncrunchy pappadums are supposed to be TOASTED. That's how they become cripsy and delicious. I never realized this. This is like buying one of those tubes of raw cookie dough, slicing it open and wondering while it's all blobby and not- cookie like.

Holy cow, I am breathtakingly stupid. Yeah.....