Are the memers still MEME-ING?

Shannon tagged me, so here we go with another meme.

A) Four jobs you have had in your life
1. Cat-Sitter for Critter, my first grade teacher's "sweet" gray tabby who bit me so hard that she drew blood when I wasn't fast enough with the can opener. I cried and ran home, leaving the pink scooter that my dad made me earn half the money for in my teacher/neighbor's driveway. Seeing the blood and tears, my mom was convinced I had locked the keys to Mrs. McM's house INSIDE the house while fleeing. (I hadn't.) She drove us around the corner to get there superfast and ran over my scooter with her Datsun.

2. Substitute Teacher. I actually liked it. Except for the time I broke an entire set of test tubes five minutes into homeroom period. Oh, and when they threw milk at me. Bloodthirsty little bastards.

3. Fast Food Worker at Subway. HATED IT! The 49-year-old manager named Lloyd was sleeping with the 19-year-old assistant manager. They used to have sex at the local Sheraton when the manager was supposed to be at... um, sorry, but I can't bring myself to call it "the restaurant".... and Lloyd's wife would call repeatedly looking for him.

4. Deli/dishwasher/hostess/"tron" at Isaac's. It sort of went in phases, but there were stretches of time when working there was really, really fun. All the sandwiches are named after birds (roast beef-swiss-and-bacon-on-rye is a hummingbird, turkey-and-muenster-with-bacon-on-pumpernickel is a finch, etc.). One time, when I ringing up a check, I asked the usual customer service question "Was everything was okay with your meal this evening?" She said, "Well.. it was delicious, but I just don't like that you kill all those beautiful birds." Remember, however, that the only actual "bird meat" on the menu includes chicken breasts and turkey. I wouldn't even blame her for getting confused, but...some of the sandwiches were named after birds that were extinct, like the Pterodactyl (basically, a hot Italian sub, but also? Not a bird. Even 65 million years ago, it wasn't a bird) and the Phoenix (Mythical creature. Never existed.)... and... doesn't she recognize a ham sandwich when she sees one? This is all I'm saying.

B) Four movies you would watch over and over:
1. Bend It Like Beckham
2. Goonies
3. The Money Pit
4. This video of my ex-boyfriend falling off a piece of scenery and breaking his back during a rehearsal for Peter Pan in high school. (This sounds like a return to the bitterness, which, I assure you, it is not. Stephen shows everyone this video. He used to bring it to parties. Once of the first times we ever hung out, a billion jillion years ago, he showed me this tape. We laughed so hard I had to run to the bathroom. It was a good day.)

C) Four places you have lived:
1. Miami, FL
2. Syracuse, NY
3. East Bumblefuck, Pennsyltucky
4. London

D) Four TV shows you love to watch:
1. Lost
2. Project Runway (I know! A Reality Show! The shame! SHAME!)
3. Law & Order: SVU (Can't. break. free. from. the. omnipresent. repeats.)
4. West Wing

E) Four places you have been on vacation:
1. Rehoboth Beach, Del.
2. Magnetic Island, Australia
3. Innsbruck, Austria (not to be confused with #2; different hemispheres)
4. Bergen, Norway

F) Four websites I visit daily:
1. dooce.com
2. My Beloved Monster & Me
3. I Blame The Patriarchy
4. One Good Thing

G) Four of my favorite foods:
1. meatball subs
2. mozzerella sticks
3. fresh watermelon
4. chicken macaroni casserole

H) Four places I would rather be right now:
1. Yosemite National Park (Soon! So soon.)
2. Mercy Hospital in Pittsburgh
3. Home
4. One workstation over, the one with the "good chair"

I'm doing something a little different with the tagging. I'm tagging four of my non-blogging readers to be Guest Memers: Julia, Wetzel, Annie S., and my mom. You're up! Guest Memes will be posted here or somewhere else nice and easy to get to.